Day One

It’s difficult to put into words how strange the world the has become. To actually be told to stay in my own home. Needless to say, this corona virus has put a wrench in many people’s lives and plans for the future. I was always taught that venturing out and exploring the outside world would be a good thing for my timid nature. For the first time in my life I am being rewarded to be a recluse.

Today was my first official “Work from Home” day. If I’m being honest, I always liked the idea of having the flexibility to work from home. I’ve tossed the idea to a few managers with often futile results. The thought was normally dismissed and regarded as a sign of millennial laziness. I feel many of the previous generations have a hard time grappling with the thought that anyone can be a productive member of society away from the office. “Showing Face” is often rewarded and guys are often patted on the back for going the extra mile, showing that they have grit in the era of political correctness and trigger warnings. This will be a massive adjustment for everyone.

I woke up today an hour later than my usual 5:00am. It was strange at first, like I had overslept and was going to be late to work. Punctuality has never been my strong suit and it has been a lifelong struggle to be an early bird. I started my morning as I usually do, reading the news and catching up on what is happening around the world with the corona virus. I make sure not to read to much however, as I am prone to bouts of obsessiveness. I am always afraid of jumping down rabbit holes of which I often take a long time to recover from. The rest of day resumed with checking emails, doing some necessary reading and planning for my work. But it was very difficult to shake the feeling of emptiness that kept stirring within me. From time to time, I would read about the current infection and death rates, all the while berating myself because I had jumped down the rabbit hole again.

I always tell myself that tomorrow is a new day. That tomorrow is the day I will check all the boxes off and high myself for a job well done. Today was not one of those days. It’s difficult not to see people feel discouraged and also myself catch an infection of despondency and hopelessness.

Tomorrow will be a different day. I have to create a schedule and stick to it. God has planned for me to use my time wisely, for I am not getting younger.