Day Two

Today was a better mental health day for me. A lot less anxiety and paranoia about the future. Not sure why my mind vacillates between the extremes of calm and frenzy sometimes. One thing that helps me a lot is to write down a simple to-do list not exceeding 10 important tasks. Underneath it, I like to write ongoing things that I am keeping a track of. I’m not sure if everyone else is just way more organized than I am but I find it very difficult to concentrate if I am not actually writing anything down.

The day was gloomier than yesterday but the rain finally washed a lot of the nasty pollen away. I’m sure the flowers and trees will sing again and we’ll again be covered in a thick layer of yellow dust. I also took another walk outside today for about 20 minutes. I find walks to be extremely therapeutic and is an opportunity to empty my mind. A lot of people don’t realize that their health is an amalgamation of all their habits put together. Those few pounds keeps accumulating without much thought until the task becomes almost to much to bear.

Lately, I’ve been reading of stories of younger people (20-30) and some an infant dying. I’m torn between wanting to “flatten the curve” and between bringing back people’s livelihoods because I think this may irreparably harm many people’s economic prospects. It’s a terrible thought to bear. I live in my small microcosm of worry and doubt but I still have not lost my job yet. I’m extremely fortunate to not work in the restaurant or service industry at this time. I can’t imagine the what a ton of bricks that suddenly losing your job would make you feel. It’s not something I like to dwell on.

For now, my focus is to remain steady and methodical in how I approach things. I intend to keep good health. This means I will aim for at least 6.5-7 hours of sleep, I’ll write my to-do lists every morning, listen to calming classical music, take frequent walks and do some form of weight training. I have a rack and a small amount of weights and bands. Those will have to do for now. It’s almost comical the way people will complain about not being able to go to the gym or go out to eat. I also miss those things we took for granted. But I also don’t believe this will be a permanent condition. This is something everyone must take one day at a time.